Overheard today (paraphrased & generalized) :
"
Thank you Jesus that I am not like them...
those poor souls trapped by cigarettes and wine.
You didn't make me like them.
I never developed a taste for the vile and addictive.
I pretended to be like them for a few seconds, it was a joke.
Everybody got it.
Me - so much like You, Lord. The ground around me so holy.
Of course I wouldn't be like one of them, directly under Your looming steeple.
That's what made it funny, see?
Bwahahahaha
Please, pass me the tea...
Unsweet?! Are you crazy?
My doctor told me I needed to cut back.
I told him people would die if so.
It's the one thing I just will not give up.
I've given up so much already.
Thank you, sweet baby Jesus.
"