Independence Day 2014

HAPPY 4th of JULY !

We spent the day @ the Plantation. 

Lunch @ Marchet Burrette 

Live Music all day. 

Meandering around the shops and grounds

 Shuttle to and from Fireworks.

It was a grand, relaxing day.



Please enjoy this short story by O. Henry: The Fourth In Salvador

Firstborn 14

Our firstborn is Fourteen.

Happy Birthday Chandler Brice!

You are an awesome young man. 

What a tremendous gift it is to know you and be a part of your life. 

We Love You!

FryingThings

In my attempt to bring this little family blog up to speed, we are nearing the Fourth of July 

(and it's only August!) 

When we were preparing to celebrate America's Independence from the Queen Mother, we asked ourselves "What is American?" 

And though we came up with some pretty humorous answers, one that we all agreed on was fried foods. So, a box of puff pastry was purchased, the fry pot filled with oil, and we began to look for creative things to wrap- though we also planned on some hand pies; Cherry & Apple.  

Gotta let it thaw

Some of those nuggets are filled with Dark Chocolate JIF- better than a Reece Cup (we tried that too) 

Clay's favorite was the ham & cheddar- next time I will try a portion with ham & cream cheese too. 

That's it... no real rhyme or reason for this post... just working through a photo archive and thought to share out healthy American eats. 

Father's Day

PaPa and Grandkids @ Waycross 2013

This is one of those days that leave me tongue tied.

Not for a lack of good things to say. Rather for trying to find a new way to say what is good and true and known and noteworthy about the man that is my father.

And then to repeat that quest for the man whose Adventures in Fatherhood I get to watch in 'real time' as he plays dad & hero to my crew of 4.

Words just fail me, that is all.

Lots of people, in assorted tributes today,  have pointed out  what makes a man a good man- qualities that carry over into their fatherhood, making them, by default, good dads.

Then there are folks who talk about what was missing- either because Time robbed them or because certain qualities or values escaped their fathers (like sobriety.) These people too, are affirming that a good man makes for a good father. Also that those of us blessed to have our father still living here amongst us are truly blessed.

I think that what makes a list about any given father special are those things that only a child or wife would be able to list... the things that others may not know about or spend enough time to see...

So, though the day is drawing to a close and though I've already bumbled through calling my dad and trying to say what words can't capture...and even though we had a nice lunch with Clay and made a batch of cookies to mark this special day-  I thought I'd try to share something specific about each man on my respective lists.

The place we had lunch with Clay today has a small stocked pond in back. I took Rye out to see the fish after we ate. There was a large fish swimming all by his lonesome... I say his because he was OBVIOUSLY The Incredible Mr. Limpett. 

Looked just like him...

Which brings me to my dad.

No, my dad doesn't look like Limpett.

My dad introduced me to The Incredible Mr. Limpett movie when I was a young girl, amongst many other treasures that were before my time and on a higher shelf than my realm of knowledge afforded.

He kindly brough the good stuff down within reach.

I almost told Riley that the fish was Mr. Limpett... I had to remember she's only 2 and has yet to see the movie. But, I know that someday, she will know who Mr. Limpett is. And I will try to convince her that we have seen him with our very own eyes.

By then, she will have seen a host of other movies or television programs that were passed on to me by my dad, too. Old ones. Good ones.

She will also know what Southern Gospel music is. We will leave the debate about what qualifies music as 'good" for another day... it is getting late :) I know there are some who may read this that do not share an appreciation  for The McKamey's
 (even though he probably finds himself humming a tune or two from time to time... not that he'd ever admit it....am I right Nick?)

Riley will know her papa, so she will know his music :) Just as the older kids already associate the two together.

First Random Share:
>>On a recent drive in the car we passed the father of one of Chandler's team mates. "He reminds me of Papa" Chandler said..."he's always playing Southern Gospel in his car, at the field"<<

When I saw Mr. Limpett today in the pond, I thought back to the excitement my dad had over sharing certain things in life with us. He has shared things with us from which he has already wrung much joy, the act of sharing bringing him even more joy.

This couldn't be more true of a good and godly heritage. A heritage that has tremendous value and is a treasure I hold close to my heart. I could talk about that long into the twilight.

But I won't.

Today- what I guess I am focused on, is that my dad wanted us to share in the things that he enjoys. He enjoys sharing good things with us. He 'gives us good gifts' (to speak with a King James accent).

I will forever link my dad with Walt Disney... indeed, they have a certain shared ingenuity.
Sure.
But I also remember the zeal with which dad led us through the gates to Epcot.
(yes, I could go for a metaphor about Heaven here... for he has given us the map to those gates with ten times the zeal... and perhaps on another day I will wax poetic about that too...) today, however, it is important to me that he enjoys a world that we are free to dream and invent in.

He has passed that appreciation on to my siblings, myself and my children.

I believe this quality too, - especially as related to Mr. Limpett- is  about my dad's appreciation for a good story, as well as good story telling; an affinity he and I share. I love that about him.

Second Random Share:
>>Around the ballpark, a certain young man and myself have an ongoing debate about whether Antarctica is a real place or not. (I maintain that Antarctica is a giant hoax) Recently, Logan heard me recruiting some 'collaborators' to my story... she said "That is exactly something Papa would do" And my heart smiled a little... I knew she was right.
Each time we talk-this kid and me- the story grows... the conspiracy theory expands.  I help explain to him what is already so clear to those of us who've discovered the truth about Antarctica. He continues to argue what he knows to be true, albeit with a hint of question in his voice...

Someday, he will know that Antarctica exists beyond any shadow of doubt...the world will be a more finite place. Perhaps though,  he will remember a time that someone tried to convince him otherwise...and see the fun in that... the thinking it made him do. Hopefully he will smile and hopefully pass the story telling game along... whether it be to deny Antarctica exists or to convince a pack of children that a whole race of miniature Indians live in their attic (one of my dad's stories... and I was convinced! So sad to discover they weren't real...) <<

To bring this to a close with one word, I suppose I'm thinking about the quality of Whimsy.

Fun-Loving may be another way to put it.

My dad has that. 

So does Clay.

So, when I take the turn to talk about the man with whom I share four children, I will prove true at least part of a cliche'- the one about us gals marrying someone who reminds us of daddy...

 (now hold up you two- I know you think you are as different as night and day, and that's just fine... but there are some similarities on MY list... and I'm the first thing ya'll have in common... so- let me try to explain...)

... the thing on my list about Clay is that he feeds ducks...and fish... and deer...and turtles, too...  with all the joy that Riley or any of the Big Kids do. (probably more actually)

And he enjoys watching our kids have a little simple fun.

I love that about him.

Last Random Share:
>>I told my mom recently about a walk we took as a family. We spotted ducks in the nearby pond. Clay insisted we get bread... (this wasn't his first time to a duck pond... he knew how to have a little fun)
I went in to get 'duck food' and came out with a bag of Cheez-It crackers... because, the only other store nearby was an expensive bakery... the croissants were more than $3 a piece...the cheesecake didn't seem duck friendly... but, No! Clay wanted to break bread with these ducks... he went back in and promptly purchased a bag of croissants to hand out to the children...to him, the fun was worth a small splurge...without a second thought.  <<

Today, as we stood watching Mr. Limpett swim in the restaurant pond, a waiter came up and handed us  a few sandwich rolls. "Would you like to feed some fish?" he asked Riley.

Yes!
Of course!

So we took the bread and began to commune with the fish in a way unique to broken bread - with a sense of awe & wonder that two vastly different worlds can meet- if only for a moment- on a bridge made out of bread. (another metaphor for a rainy day...)

As he went back to work, I overheard the bread bestowing waiter's co-worker remark:

 "Awww, you can tell you're a daddy!"

To which I simply add, EXACTLY.

So, we wished him a happy father's day as he returned to his tasks-at-hand.

And we went back to feeding fish.

When Riley- who throws awfully big chunks of bread(...chunks the size of entire sandwich rolls, in fact...)- ran out of bread to toss on the water, she asked for more.

To which her daddy gladly offered her a share of his portion.  "Here you go, baby."

Passing down the fun he was having- so that he could enjoy watching her have the same fun.

See? Similar... Fun-Loving.

Oh, wait- I think I see a connecting theme here., too.. a bring-it-all-down-to-a-redeeming-moral opportunity... I did not plan it... did not plan any moral at all actually, but alas:

Matthew 7:9“Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 12So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.

According to my clock, there's only a scant 15 minutes left on this special day for fathers.  I am blessed to have been raised by one of the good ones. I am further blessed to be partnered with another truly good one. I am undeserving to belong to the best one- a heavenly Father who gave both of these good 'gifts' to me. 

If your dad has left earth...if you are a single mom... if there are some really hard life lessons your dad could stand to learn... you are not an orphan and you are not alone... even the really good daddies are mere reflections of One far greater... a Father accessible to all... through the Body- that bread of Christ, broken to connect two vastly different worlds.

Yes, I believe that is the right note to end on.

Happy Father's Day (to all... )

Grandpaw's Long Good-Bye

General Jackson Carnes

There has always been a small, unofficial tradition that accompanied visits to my grandparents' home. Whenever it was time to leave, generally after many, many false starts that resulted in visiting just a little longer, they would walk us out, give one last round of good bye hugs and kisses, and then they would stand in the drive way, smiling and waving until our car was out of sight.



I have noticed this tradition spill over into visits with my parents. And on those rare but wonderful mornings where Clay and I are able to steal a little porch time together before he heads out to work, I find myself remaining on the porch, where I see him off in much the same way...even when he is past the point of seeing me, I stand waving (or flicking the porch light), watching until he fades from view.



It is really a way of saying "I love you so, I hate to see you go..."



During my grandfather's funeral, I remarked to a few people that I saw a similarity in the way we had been asked to say farewell to him. Disease had demanded we all watch him slowly disappear,  his burial was that final moment of invisibility.



Over the last handful of years the disease that started out by slowly robbing from him one word or memory at a time began to rapidly snatch armloads without apology. He was left bankrupt of speech, mobility and a million other little things that you take for granted as permanent fixtures until they turn up missing, like eye twinkles.



By the time he left us completely last week, all that remained was a frail human frame and an ironclad legacy.



Much like standing in the driveway waving and waving and waving~ over the last few years we have been quietly waving and waving and waving goodbye- until we just couldn't see him anymore.

~*~

Some of us had conversations or interactions with Grandpa before the diagnosis was made that only later could we look back on as evidence of change.

"I really should be going now"

And then there was the diagnosis - but it had been declared over a strong and resilient old man. Nothing changed drastically at first. So, we poured another cup of coffee and enjoyed our visiting a little longer.

• New and never before heard stories. 


• Really, really listening to the old ones. 


• Thinking of questions we may someday want answered. 

"I've got to be going now... for real this time." 

Then, the changes did happen~a little too fast. Realization of the "Impending Irreversible" setting in as if he stood, jangling his keys and walking towards the door.

• Confused words. 


• Wrong names and mistaken identities


• Shuffle, Shuffle, Step.

"It's getting late, best hit the road before it gets dark."

With a sudden slam, like a car door, a shift into Reverse.

• A phone call about a  fall. 


• His broken neck nailing the basement shut


• Hospital Waiting Room Reunions

"It was good to see you all- and all together, too!" 

And then, it was all downhill. Time spent waving, and waving and waiting. 

• A sky blue hearse. 


• A life commemorated in slideshow. 


• Family gathered once more from all four corners. 

"I'll see you all again real soon !"

  I believe God turned that slow dissolve into a mercy, allowing us to come gently to a place in time where *General Jackson Carnes  no longer lives here on this old, fallen Earth.



We each gleaned a spirit of wanderlust and adventure from GJC... and as a result, we all live, well,  EVERYWHERE, really. Time afforded us all the opportunity to make necessary travel plans, to sit at his side and say good bye in our own special ways.



We are a large family, so this was no small mercy. Everyone was afforded ample time for a visit of their own. To obtain any needed closure or counsel.



Time also afforded us many lessons: lessons about what a life well-used looks like, lessons about dying gracefully and kindness and the wealth of leaving a truly good legacy.  We learned lessons about family and faith and service to one another, about what it means to touch lives. We all learned so much from this one life... and from the way this one life ended.

He was a teachable man.

He was also a willing teacher. 

~*~

During a visit before his decline in communication, Grandpaw shared a story that I had never heard before. As he told the story, it was the first time in my life hearing that he ever drank anything harder than Apple Cider Vinegar.



 Grandpaw was very careful with stories. He knew their powerful potential and the way they can be twisted into something other than what was intended. He never wanted us to use stories of his past to justify wrong choices for our present; he had lived a pretty adventurous life.



There were many stories that we were not permitted to hear because he loved us; he wanted to protect from inspiring folly.



And yet, when one of us had already waded into folly neck deep, those same stories were brought out of the vault, out of the self same love and protection. He would share his own journey humbly, not glorifying the folly, instead encouraging that 'the road is never to  narrow to turn around'.



As he shared with us that story, about putting an emptied whiskey bottle up on the mantle piece in his home- out of resolve **'no longer to linger' , he solidified for me that the redemption he had found in Christ was worth full abandonment of all the folly he had ever found before. He shared the story from that same resolved place where he drew the line all those decades ago. I could see for myself that he had never recanted. He never went back for a new bottle. He didn't make excuses.  He was well studied in the Scriptures and though he could have easily built an argument on Christian liberty, he didn't look for loopholes... for him, what he found in Christ quenched every kind of thirst.

He loved us and wanted the best for each of us.  He believed the best we could do was to know Christ. 

Grandpaw's life affirmed that desire and demonstrated Christ's love- in word & deed. 



Regardless of how grievous our mistakes, or how strongly he disagreed with some path or choice we may have made, he continued to love us, to be kind. He demonstrated the willingness to help, to come alongside, to simply be present.



Because his life directly informed mine, I know that he lived his life for the very prize of dying. I know that there was no greater joy than for this man to hear his children are walking in truth.



I am the granddaughter of General Jackson Carnes. A man who no longer lives on this earth but who lived out his faith and love for Christ in such a way that I know I will see him again.

*(a small entry I wrote about his diagnosis back in 2007)

** Featuring an autoharp

<

What A Day

Happy Baby Brad & Jamela! 

Can't wait to meet you, 

Little BabyBerry Hagan! 

Happy 36th Anniversary Grammy &amp; PaPa

Happy 36th Anniversary to my parents. 

Your marriage is a shining example. 

Thank You.

Central Wesleyan College Days

Family Birthday

She said "I NEED A PARTY HAT!" 

We sometimes call our anniversary a "Family Birthday". Especially during seasons where sitters are scarce and we will be celebrating with the entire family. This was one of those celebrations. We have been very busy with baseball & the business and our family's 'birthday' fell during a particularly Extra Busy Weekend. On Wednesday night, as everyone was busy with Duck Dynasty (I tuned in from my dish washing station in the kitchen) I secretly concocted one of Clay's preferred treats: Jello Cake.

(He's forever in the debt of his mother in law for the passing down of this recipe :) 

One thing about Jell-O cake is that it calls for Whipped topping- an element that always makes for a decorating challenge... a blank, white, slippery canvas to be improved upon. 

I began to rifle through Riley's small plastic toys for something quirky when I came to these two finger puppets. I was quickly inspired to dress them up appropriately for an anniversary cake. It's just some scraps of ribbon and a few pins but it took concerted effort to get everything just so. 

The Family Birthday/15th Anniversary Jell-o Poke Cake: 

When I was in between steps on the cake, I was also secretly working on my special gift to Clay. We have always sort of played with those traditional and modern gift listings- usually picking something with a bit of a twist. According to this year's list, the appropriate gift would be a timepiece or crystal. I figured out a different take on a timepiece and that was the 'serious' gift. But, I couldn't figure out what Clay could really use made out of crystal. Somewhere in the brainstorming process, my brain switched to Krystal. So I made him a tiny Krystal...with real crystal onions. :)~ the 'not-so-serious-or-as-expensive-but-my-favorite' gift"

 Final touches on the tiny burger were finished around 1 AM. There were multiple coats of glaze to be applied, and a crack in the box to repair due to some miscalculations on the thickness of the cheese combined with the thickness of the mustard...

And then- it was cake for breakfast. Jell-o cake never lasts long in this house, nor can those who devour restrain their forks for long.

 The cake was gone almost as quickly as it was made.

 And that is how we kicked off our "Next 15 Years" (just imagining what those years hold...children in college & finding their spouses... maybe even welcoming grandchildren...wild, I tell you. And me?  I'm looking forward to every second of it.

FIFTEEN

Happy BrewCrew Birthday.

(a.k.a. An Anniversary Celebrated W/Children :) 

Today we are 15. 

(Yes, he smooshed me with the cake.)